My apartment has terrible cell phone reception. Every time I get a call I have to run out onto the porch to hear anything...
Today my porch excursion lasted a bit longer than I anticipated. My brother called, so, naturally, I ran to the door, unlocked it and headed outside. I was sitting on a chair on the porch, and it was raining. It was a bit chilly and I wanted to go inside, but knew I wouldn't have a clear signal. So, I sat in the cold, chatting away with a bit of rain spraying on me. Frank, my roommate for the summer, poked his head outside after I had been on the phone for about 40 minutes. He said "Hey, I'm going to Wal-Mart, do you need anything?" I replied that I didn't, and he headed out. My phone conversation continued, and I realized that I needed to pee. I had guzzled two huge glasses of water only moments before my brother called. My brother and I got off the phone a few minutes later, and I headed back into the apartment...
The door was locked.
Frank must have locked it when he left for Wal-Mart. I checked again. Yep, it was locked. So, I went to Frank's sliding door. Also locked. So I ventured out in the yard in the rain and went around the building to the front door. Also locked. By this time I had to pee pretty bad, and the sound of rain and the cold weren't helping. I considered popping a squat in the bushes but thought better of it. I don't need any citations for public indecency. So, I went back to the porch and decided to keep myself busy. I found out that we have a string of lights that go around the top of the porch. I tested them. Very nice. I also remembered that we have a TV on the porch. Bobby Flay was challenging this guy from New York that makes really good hotdogs on Food TV. It made me want a hotdog real bad. It also made me temporarily forget about having to pee.
So, after almost an hour of sitting outside, Frank returned. He was very apologetic. I finally was able to relieve myself.
We decided to hide a key to avoid future issues. Good idea? Absolutely.
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